I use this calculator... http://onebeer.net/batchspargecalc.shtml
. It works well for me. You do want your two running a to be about equal. So you'll need more mash water than sparge water. Yes, double crush your grains. I all but pulverize mine... I actually get better filtration with a finely crushed grain. Stir as you add your grain to the mash water. I usually add the grain and the water together. Then once all the water and grain is in your tun, give it one last good stir. If you don't have dough balls then, you're not going to develop any throughout the mashing process. 60 minutes should be fine. I like Jon's advice on a wort measuring stick. I used to use one, but I've changed filtering mechanisms in my kettle, that I have too many markings on the stick to make sense of it anymore. I need to get back to using one again, myself.