[majorvices]

https://local.theonion.com/beer-aisle-scanned-for-something-asshole-friend-won-t-m-1823433792


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[Robert]

If our harried fictional hero had found a beer to take, he'd have ended up drinking it wrong anyway.  His buddy would no doubt also be a glasshole.   (Just recently learned that much-needed term, I've probably just been under a rock.)