Public drunkeness? I thought someone had to be drunk and disorderly to be arrested? Don't step outside your home if you've been drinking now? I know you can't take a whiz outside on your own property anymore...
Reminds me of a South Park episode where Randy Marsh goes to his son's little league game, gets blazing drunk, and in fist fights with other parents, each time, and each time as the cops drag him away is drunkenly protesting, "Scuse me, I thought this was America! I thought this was a free country!"
Cap, this might break your brain, but imagine the immense biodiversity of hotel shower floors.