1/ It's also not a saison if you use 3787 like you did on your tripel. No saison yeast = not a saison, period.
2/ APAs, AIPAs, and IIPAs shouldn't be cloyingly sweet. If it is, you blew it.
3/ +1 to water treatment. Gypsum in hoppy beers really helps.
4/ There are other great styles besides IPA. More lagers, kolsch, Belgian and Scottish beers would be a good thing.
5/Hefeweizen shouldn't be a banana and bubblegum bomb. Ferment a little cooler.
6/ Belgian beers are better if you don't ferment too warm. There are lots of domestic 'Belgians' that are overly estery and/or phenolic. Like in hefe, a banana bomb is not good.
7/ More CAPs would be a good thing. Probably more CAPs in a big regional comp than are brewed in the U.S. by breweries.
EDIT - And using beard material, testicles and bodily secretions in beer isn't being creative or bold. It's just plain stupid.