Shameless plug my mash/volumes/temps/efficiencies/gravities,etcetc calculator. It just wont stop growing!
http://pricelessbrewing.github.io/BiabCalc/If you're batch* sparging (which you should be doing) and not fly sparging,(which is more effective ideally but much harder to get correct due to needed specific setup for drainage/mashtun geometery/lots of time etc), then don't worry too much about your run off ratio. Yes, a 1:1 ratio is best but the difference between a 4:1 ratio and a 1:1 ratio is small. My standard simulation gives 84.6% mash efficiency with a 1:1 and a 83.2% with a 4:1 ratio. Don't worry about it...
Pick your mash thickness first, I like 1.75 as it generally gives me a good conversion efficiency while leaving some water left over to do a good sparge.
If you're not fly sparging, don't bother with a mashout, it's unnecessary. Keep your "mashout" temp below 171 regardless. In my mind, it's not worth the extra effort and risk of tannin extraction.
*A well done batch sparge is quick, and very effective. Drain mash tun, add water, stir the crap out of it.