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Author Topic: Beer Review Generator.  (Read 5498 times)

Offline rabid_dingo

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Beer Review Generator.
« on: November 13, 2009, 10:19:10 pm »
Denny's beer name generator reminded me of this little gem. I would love to memorize one
of these and spring it on an unsuspecting brewer.

Beer Review Generator

"Pours a clear strawberry blonde with a nine-inch head. Stunning lacing.
Excellent earthy nose, maybe a little mango and coffee. Absolutely
disgusting biscuity flavor, with marzipan and hops. Elegant mouthfeel
and slightly dry finish. Score: 4.98/5."
 ;D

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Ruben * Colorado :)

Offline denny

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #1 on: November 14, 2009, 09:46:25 am »
COOL!

"Pours a vivid pitch black with a cumulonimbus head. Amazing lacing. Delicate biscuity aroma, maybe a little cilantro and baking soda. Excellent tart taste, with just a hint of caramel and pine. Heavy mouthfeel and saccharine finish. Score: 4.06/5."

Cilantro and baking soda????  Sounds like on of Drew's beers!  ;)
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Offline dbeechum

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #2 on: November 15, 2009, 01:10:07 am »
Quote from: denny on November 14, 2009, 09:46:25 am
Cilantro and baking soda????  Sounds like on of Drew's beers!  ;)

Well you know, the soda's there to help accentuate the soapiness of the cilantro. Sheesh, doesn't everyone know that?
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Offline dean

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #3 on: November 15, 2009, 09:18:36 am »
 :D :D :D :D

Pours a hazy chestnut with a thick, rocky head. Sexy lacing. Intense sour scent, with notes of bourbon and lilac. Overweening boozy taste, with overtones of sherry and rosewater. Dense, dense mouthfeel and bitter, bitter finish. Score: 3.37/5.

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Offline babalu87

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #4 on: November 15, 2009, 11:16:37 am »
Pours a turbulent black with a thick, rocky head. Amazing lacing. Nightmarish fruity aroma, with notes of molasses and biscuit malt. Beautiful biscuity taste, accompanied by strawberry and bacon. Gritty mouthfeel and bitter finish. Score: 3.89/5.

BACON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Jeff

On draught:
IIPA, Stout, Hefeweizen, Hallertau Pale Ale, Bitter

Primary:
Hefeweizen,Berliner Weisse, Mead

Offline The Professor

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #5 on: November 17, 2009, 05:22:29 pm »
Quote from: rabid_dingo on November 13, 2009, 10:19:10 pm
Denny's beer name generator reminded me of this little gem. I would love to memorize one
of these and spring it on an unsuspecting brewer.

Beer Review Generator



HA! Awsome!
here's mine:

Pours a murky wheat-straw color with a cumulonimbus head. Heavy lacing. Absolutely disgusting herbal aroma, with old newsprint and pine. Disturbing hoppy palate, with just a hint of bubblegum and marzipan. Chalky mouthfeel and disappointing finish. Score: 2.04/5.
 :P

Actually, a bit like the last $12.00 "extreme" brew I bought. :(
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AL
New Brunswick, NJ
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Offline babalu87

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #6 on: November 17, 2009, 06:48:09 pm »
Quote from: The Professor on November 17, 2009, 05:22:29 pm
HA! Awsome!
here's mine:

Pours a murky wheat-straw color with a cumulonimbus head. Heavy lacing. Absolutely disgusting herbal aroma, with old newsprint and pine. Disturbing hoppy palate, with just a hint of bubblegum and marzipan. Chalky mouthfeel and disappointing finish. Score: 2.04/5.
 :P

Actually sounds like something Tubercle would brew  ;D

Juniper  :P
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Jeff

On draught:
IIPA, Stout, Hefeweizen, Hallertau Pale Ale, Bitter

Primary:
Hefeweizen,Berliner Weisse, Mead

Offline fightdman

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #7 on: November 18, 2009, 08:30:34 pm »
Pours a dense orange with a two-finger head. Beautiful lacing. Stunning buttery scent, accompanied by cola and tarragon. Lovely musty palate, with just a hint of raisin and circus peanut. Silky smooth mouthfeel and long, long finish. Score: 3.40/5

Ha! Not Jolly Rancher but Circus Peanuts!  Now there's an idea! :o
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GAVDIVM MIHI VAE TIBI

Offline nicneufeld

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #8 on: November 19, 2009, 02:30:26 pm »
ROFL, I have a 90s era book of beer reviews by F Paul Pacult, this generator would have made his job a lot easier!
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Offline matt

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #9 on: November 19, 2009, 03:30:29 pm »
Pours a turbulent coffee color with a ruddy brown head. Half-decent lacing. Brilliant lemony nose, maybe a little old newsprint and banana. Lovely yeasty palate, with forward alcohol and bourbon. Chalky mouthfeel and light finish. Score: 4.60/5.

Thanks for reminding about this site...
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Offline redbeerman

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #10 on: November 20, 2009, 12:57:22 pm »
Pours a turbulent light brown with almost no head. Very light lacing. Nightmarish smoky scent, with just a hint of circus peanut and hamster cage. Overweening yeasty palate, with overtones of forward alcohol and plum. Non-descript mouthfeel and thin finish. Score: 2.31/5.

Hamster cage?  Blecchhhh! :P
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Offline bluesman

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Re: Beer Review Generator.
« Reply #11 on: November 20, 2009, 03:42:52 pm »
Pours a turbulant chunky ruby brown with an explosive bottle bursting bedrock head and a petrous lacing. Smokey barnyard aroma, with just a hint of horse hair and a muskrat nose. Dazzling bicuit profile with overtones of turpentine and fig. Pulverant mouthfeel with a lip puckering rancid finish. Score: 1.04/5

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Ron Price
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