[halenrush]

Seen on a shirt:

Chuck Norris doesn't do push ups.  He pushes the earth down. 
Chuck Norris has been to Mars.  Thats why there is no life there.
Chuck Norris can gargle peanut butter. 
Chuck Norris doesn't have to mow his lawn.  He dares it to grow.



Keep 'em coming.

[gordonstrong]

For math fans:

Chuck Norris counted to infinity. Twice.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

[nicneufeld]

The subject line has a sort of Emma Lazarus sound to it:

Give us your tired jokes, your poor jokes
Your huddled masses of Chuck Norris jokes yearning to breathe free

[/i]

[mnstorm99]

You don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you
Chuck Norris can skip a stone under water
Chuck Norris can make a three sided square
Chuck Norris can alphabatize m&m's
Chuck Norris can watch a 60 minute TV episode in 22 seconds

[weithman5]

my favorite two.  google find chuck norris. it replies "google won't search for chuck norris because it knows chuck norris finds you.

my son was quoted in his high school yearbook where he would graffiti his name if he could.  there in black and white it says "chuck norris's forehead. because if i can get away with that i can get away with anything"

[theDarkSide]

The Dark Side of the Force succumbs to Chuck Norris!

[theDarkSide]

Chuck Norris can watch a 60 minute TV episode in 22 seconds

So can I with Tivo 

[rabid_dingo]

Chuck Norris has never had a stuck mash.
Chuck Norris can brew a perfect beer with 1lb of barley 1 quart of water one yeast cell and an ice cold pint glass.
Chuck Norris heats his mash tun with roundhouse kicks to the cooler.
Chuck Norris once had a red cooler for a mash tun, but it turned blue after the first roundhouse kick.
If Chuck Norris enters a home brew competition everyone else automatically loses.
 

[weithman5]

Chuck Norris heats his mash tun with roundhouse kicks to the cooler.

Rueben wins

[weazletoe]

www.chucknorrisfacts.com


Also, go to google, typre in "Chuck Norris", and the click "Feeling Lucky".

[blatz]

www.chucknorrisfacts.com


Also, go to google, typre in "Chuck Norris", and the click "Feeling Lucky".

damn - you beat me to it.

[riverrat]

Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer.... Too bad he will never cry.

[gordonstrong]

I love the new beer-related jokes.  It's fresh content.  OK, here's one.

Chuck Norris doesn't need to mash. The grain converts out of fear.

[gordonstrong]

Ninkasi tries to win the Chuck Norris Award.

[blatz]

Chuck Norris chills hot wort just by staring at it.