Author Topic: Worst Homebrew Ever!  (Read 3060 times)

Offline Slowbrew

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #15 on: February 12, 2011, 02:35:50 PM »
My second year of brewing I made a "Christmas Ale".  Black as pitch and with all the spices, vanilla beans and a lot of extract I had spent over $50 on this one beer (10 years agoe).  I bottled it in September, chilled and tasted one in December.  It was the worst tasting thing I had ever had.  So many flavors were trying to come forward and dominate it made my wife want to get sick.

I was unwilling to throw it away so I let it age, thinking it might get better (actually I was too cheap to give up on it).  After a year it was still awful.  After it two it was getting a little better.  The short versin is that 7 years later we drank the last one and had to admit it had gotten to be pretty good.  I figure another 3 years in the bottle and it would have been something I would serve to others.

7 - 10 years is a little longer than I like to cellar a beer though.

Paul
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Offline dannyjed

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #16 on: February 12, 2011, 03:10:24 PM »
My first Barley Wine turned out way too sweet...kinda like cough syrup with a hint of hops.
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Offline gisbrewmaster

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #17 on: February 12, 2011, 05:05:43 PM »
My second or 3rd beer 3 years ago I made a honey amber ale from a kit.  It followed all the instruction including ferm temp recommendation it tasted like battery acid.  Being lazy and all i kept it in the closet for almost a year when SWMBO asked if she could have some of her space back. I cracked on opened and it was awesome!  I think I have learned honey takes time!

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Offline witsok

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #18 on: February 12, 2011, 06:16:37 PM »
My second batch.  I made one extract kit previously, never read a brewing book but been on plenty of brewery tours.  Of course, tours for the most part don't really give any information on how beer is really made - especially 20 years ago.  So I decided extract brewing wasn't for me and I want to do all-grain (did I mention I never read a homebrewing book).  So I bought all black patent, ground it into flour and boiled it.  Tried to seperate the grain from the water, pia!  Surpise, it didn't ferment and tasted like $#%^.  So I decided I better read some books.  Been brewing regularily since 1992.

Offline Bret

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #19 on: February 12, 2011, 07:43:23 PM »
My second batch.  I made one extract kit previously, never read a brewing book but been on plenty of brewery tours.  Of course, tours for the most part don't really give any information on how beer is really made - especially 20 years ago.  So I decided extract brewing wasn't for me and I want to do all-grain (did I mention I never read a homebrewing book).  So I bought all black patent, ground it into flour and boiled it.  Tried to seperate the grain from the water, pia!  Surpise, it didn't ferment and tasted like $#%^.  So I decided I better read some books.  Been brewing regularily since 1992.

We may have a winner. This is hilarious.
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Online tschmidlin

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #20 on: February 12, 2011, 11:51:39 PM »
My second batch.  I made one extract kit previously, never read a brewing book but been on plenty of brewery tours.  Of course, tours for the most part don't really give any information on how beer is really made - especially 20 years ago.  So I decided extract brewing wasn't for me and I want to do all-grain (did I mention I never read a homebrewing book).  So I bought all black patent, ground it into flour and boiled it.  Tried to seperate the grain from the water, pia!  Surpise, it didn't ferment and tasted like $#%^.  So I decided I better read some books.  Been brewing regularily since 1992.

We may have a winner. This is hilarious.

Yeah, great story!  Do you remember how much black patent you bought for what volume?  I'm wondering what the people at the homebrew shop thought.
Tom Schmidlin

Offline dbeechum

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #21 on: February 13, 2011, 12:06:06 AM »
No way I can top that one, but similarly my second batch went pear shaped.

Think it was a side effect of cockiness and a lack of sanitation.

Damn thing wasn't even worth making chili with.
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Offline maxieboy

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #22 on: February 13, 2011, 08:48:57 AM »
My second batch.  I made one extract kit previously, never read a brewing book but been on plenty of brewery tours.  Of course, tours for the most part don't really give any information on how beer is really made - especially 20 years ago.  So I decided extract brewing wasn't for me and I want to do all-grain (did I mention I never read a homebrewing book).  So I bought all black patent, ground it into flour and boiled it.  Tried to seperate the grain from the water, pia!  Surpise, it didn't ferment and tasted like $#%^.  So I decided I better read some books.  Been brewing regularily since 1992.

We may have a winner. This is hilarious.



Fixed... :D
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Offline gmac

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #23 on: February 13, 2011, 11:09:01 AM »
My second batch.  I made one extract kit previously, never read a brewing book but been on plenty of brewery tours.  Of course, tours for the most part don't really give any information on how beer is really made - especially 20 years ago.  So I decided extract brewing wasn't for me and I want to do all-grain (did I mention I never read a homebrewing book).  So I bought all black patent, ground it into flour and boiled it.  Tried to seperate the grain from the water, pia!  Surpise, it didn't ferment and tasted like $#%^.  So I decided I better read some books.  Been brewing regularily since 1992.

We may have a winner. This is hilarious.

Yeah, I thought mine was bad but at least I got something akin to beer.  I can't imagine what you had, some sort of barley soup???



Fixed... :D

Offline ullarsskald1989

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #24 on: February 13, 2011, 12:05:13 PM »
July 1974, my 1st batch.

I had noticed that the local A&P was selling 3# cans of Blue Ribbon malt syrup (with the little picture of Lena Pabst standing next to the logo) in the baking section.  I knew from reading my dad's Bud labels that beer had malt in it, so, hmmmm...maybe I can make beer.

Bought 2 cans, popped off the label and found a Prohibition era recipe: 2 cans malt, 1 can table sugar, 2 packets bread yeast (to be added after the liquid cooled to "baby bottle" temp) and enough hot water to make 5 gallons.

Remembering that dad's Bud mentioned hops, I looked that up in the dictionary: herb that gives beer bitterness.  Okay, no hops, what else is bitter...dandelion roots, just like making coffee substitute.  So, 4 ounces of cleaned, chopped dandelion roots, figured I should boil them in the water before dissolving in the syrup.

Got an empty frosting bucket from Dunkin Donuts to ferment the beer in, a rubber sheet and some string to hold it on as a topper (following what I had observed of a couple of my mom's uncles who made wine).

The local hardware store stocked cork lines caps.  My mom found an old Ideal capper at a garage sale (75¢, I still use it), Powers' Bar provided 2 cases of empties, the pet store some aquarium water line...

(fast forward) I drank 1/2 a glass, poured the rest down the drain and forgot about that batch.

15 years later my mom reminded me that it was still sitting in the cupboard in the back corner of the basement.  I buried all I could find...the other case turned up about 7 years ago and joined it's mate in the grave by the side of the garage. =)

Needless to say, I've improved.
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Offline el_capitan

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Re: Worst Homebrew Ever!
« Reply #25 on: February 13, 2011, 07:35:15 PM »
I attempted to make alcoholic root beer - that was a big mistake!

A buddy gave me a 5-year old extract kit with about 3 lb of corn sugar and some DME.  Even though I knew better, I thought "what the hell" and brewed it.  DUMPER! 

Those were about the worst.  It's kind of nice to brew 1-2 horrible batches, so everything else looks good by comparison!